Locked Away
by brianandjustinfan
Summary: Since Justin left for New York both Brian and Justin's lives are far from happy. With Brian having shut himself of from everyone and Justin deteriorating both physically and mentally, how will both men fix their relationship when Justin returns and an accident occurs?
1. Chapter 1

**A/N:**** Hello guys, this is my first ever fan fiction story and I would appreciate it if u gave me some feedback on whether I should continue. I will admit i'm not the best at writing and constructive criticism is welcomed otherwise I crave your support and comments on whether it is bad or good so I know whether to continue it. I have a general idea of where it is going to go but if anyone had any ideas they are welcome. Also I would like your vote on whether this story should be an Mpreg later on, so vote away! So read away and please review!**

**PS: Brian is kind of OC because this is how I would have liked him to be at the end of season 5 and for Justin to accept it. **

CHAPTER 1: Justin's eyes suddenly opened in the darkness of his small apartment. He could hear his roommate snoring in the room next door. He looked at his alarm clock on his bedroom stand. The bright red numbers glowed, 4:00am. Justin hadn't had much sleep that night, like most nights his eyes just wouldn't close. Since he had moved to New York 2 months ago the best night's sleep he had got was when he first arrived, and that was induced by jet lag. Every night there was only one thing on his mind. Brian. Every day, he wondered if he should have come to New York to pursue his art career. He knew that Brian had wanted him to go but still... His art career was only part of his life and he didn't feel complete without Brian. He rolled over to his bedside table and turned his phone on. The bright light hurt his eyes, after he adjusted to the brightness of his phone, he looked at a picture of Brian and himself that Lindsey had took when they both arrived at her house for lunch. It was his favourite picture of them both, they both looked so young, innocent and without a care in the world. Happy. He looked through the rest of his pictures that night most of them were of Brian, some of his art, some of himself and friends. He came to the very last picture it was of Brian and himself at their rehearsal dinner, in suits ready for their wedding. He could remember that day and night so clearly. Where they told each other they loved each other, when they told their friends the wedding was off, their last time they were together and the day he left Pittsburgh. Justin's eyes glistened with unshed tears, he quickly blinked them away when the picture began to blur. He whispered,  
'I love you'  
then drifted off to sleep with the phone in his hands, the picture still alight...

Brian awoke with a pounding headache. His night had been full of events. He got out of his bed and got a glass of water. He took a sip and started to massage his temples. He walked over to his chaise lounge chair just out of direct sunlight but so he still got the warmth off the sun's rays. He lay back and tried to recall last night. He remembered meeting Mikeyy, Ted, Emmet and their significant others at the front of Babylon. He remembered the pang in his heart when he arrived there alone, especially since everyone else came with their husbands or boyfriends. He remembered standing at the bar alone, while watching his friends dance with their partners, he remembered missing Justin so much that he decided to get rid of the pain by drinking and uncountable amount of alcohol and getting high. He was now feeling the effects. He sat up out of his chair and trundled over to the kitchen cupboard to grab an aspirin. He swallowed the pill with ease and lent on the kitchen worktop, thinking about one thing and one thing only. Justin. He regretted every day not telling Justin he loved him from the start. He regretted every day that he didn't marry Justin. He regretted every day letting Justin go... He decided to get some work done to put his mind of Justin. He turned his computer on; he raised an eyebrow and wondered why it was off as he never usually turns it off. The screensaver lit up and Brian then knew why. The same picture that Justin loved and the one that Lindsey took of them both was on his computer screen. He stared at the picture intently, each second it brang new and more painful memories. A tear ran down his cheek and he whispered,  
'I miss you'  
He regained composure, quickly wiped the tear away and slammed the computer off. He angrily got up from his computer and walked over to his bedroom and collapsed onto his bed, he pulled the sheets over his jeans and then his bare chest. He buried his face into his pillow and his eyes clamped shut, he fell asleep easily and dreamed about Justin.


	2. Chapter 2

CHAPTER 2: Brian arrived at the diner. He stopped there usually every morning just before he went to work. It was busy as usual, he saw Debbie running around in her usual frantic state. She was wearing a t-shirt saying 'Got Cream?' Brian chuckled to himself it was quite the contrast form the smart and sexy grey suit he was wearing. He walked over to a booth were Mikeyy, Emmet and Ted were sat. He slid in next to Mikeyy and greeted everyone with a sarcastic 'Good morning'. The guys all replied...

'Heyy Brian' in unison.

'You okay today?' Mikeyy started.

'Yeah why wouldn't I be?'

'I don't know... you seemed a little down yesterday. Plus you were incredibly high!'

'Why how nice of you to check up on me Mikeyy' Brian commented snidely.

'You don't have to be such an ass I was just worried.' Mikeyy said looking down.

Brian realised how much of an ass he had been and nudged him on the shoulder and smiled. Mikeyy smiled back.

'Deb can I get some service?' Brian shouted.

'Yeah hold your horses!' She hollered back.

After a couple of minutes Deb came over, pulling her pen and pad out of her pocket, 'What'll it be? She said.

'Turkey sandwich, no mayo, to go'

Coming right up she said pinching Brian's cheek and then walking off to give the chef the order. While Brian waited he noticed Hunter working, his hair was now short, the way that Justin had it before he left him Brian thought, he suddenly felt a pang in his heart. Justin. He watched hunter bus some tables, he had a tight top on and jeans. If you didn't know any better you would think he was Justin from behind, apart from his light chestnut hair that was such a contrast to the beautiful blonde locks Brian loved so much. Brian shook his head to get the thoughts of Justin out of his mind but it didn't work. He felt a pang in his heart, when the sun shone through the window onto hunter. Sunshine. Tears formed in his eyes but he quickly blinked them away. As soon as Debbie brought his sandwich to the table, he grabbed it and rushed out the door.

'What's with him?' Debbie commented sliding in where Brian had been sat.

'I don't know. Mikeyy said. 'Ever since Justin left he hasn't been himself, he has been taking more drugs and alcohol. I hardly ever see him apart from when I pick him up and drop him off at Babylon and in the mornings before he goes to work.'

'Hmmmm, speaking of Sunshine has any of you heard from him or know how he's doing?' Debbie said, with a little sadness in her voice. 'I miss him...'

'Nah not me' 'me neither' Emmet and ted said, who had been unusually quite in the past hour.

'I haven't either' Mikeyy said looking at his mum.

'I wonder how he is doing, maybe I should call him?' Debbie said.

'Sure, that will be cool.' Mikeyy said. Even though, he had hated Justin when they first met, he realised that Brian loved the kid and eventually had learned to tolerate him but there was still a part of him, however big that maybe, that's has always been jealous of Justin as he had Brian in a way he never could. He also realised that his best friend had changed so much since boy wonder came into his life and he wasn't sure if that was a good or a bad thing... He just hated what the little blonde twink was doing to him...

**A/N: Review!  
and Mpreg or not VOTE! **


	3. Chapter 3

**DISCLAIMER – I own nothing just the little idea in my head for this story!  
If you love Mikeyy, I warn you he will go quite OCC and there is a bit of bashing in the chapters to come, but all will be resolved later on!**

CHAPTER 3: The drive to work was lonely. Since seeing Hunter at the diner it just reminded him even more that he was alone and that Justin was in New York. Loads of emotions and questions were running through Brian's mind. Why had he let Justin go? He would be happy right now, but all he can think about is Justin. He was the saddest he had ever been in his whole life...

When he got to work, he called for Cynthia. She rushed over.

'Cancel all my meetings today'

'Okay, done. When shall I re-schedule them all for?' She asked.

'Next week.'

Cynthia turned and rushed back to her computer. She knew she shouldn't ask why, working for Brian Kinney all these years had taught her something.

Brian walked into his office and threw his coat and bag on the floor, then collapsed onto the sofa. He had a pounding headache. He started to rub his temples, one thing racing through his mind. Justin. He closed his eyes, drifting off to sleep, dreaming about his past...

Meanwhile, Debbie had just finished her shift and was putting her coat on; she walked out the door and waited for Mikeyy to bring the car around. When he parked in front of the diner, she got in and they listened to the radio all the way home. When they got through the door, Debbie saw Carl on the sofa watching CSI: MIAMI.

'Heyy, hunnie' she said, joyfully.

'Heyy Deb and nice to see you Mikeyy' Carl said offering his hand to Mikeyy, who took it and shook it lightly.

'Deb i'm going to go to bed. Night.' He said, walking over and kissing her forehead and making his way upstairs. Deb smiled and slumped into a dining room chair; Mikeyy walked over and sat next to her. He reached out and grabbed her hand. They sat in companionable silence for a bit, until Debbie piped up.

'Heyy how about some cocoa and then we will call Justin?' She asked. Mikeyy nodded. While Deb was making the cocoa, Mikeyy had gotten Deb's phone book and started to search through the mass of numbers until he found Justin's cell and home number. Deb picked the 2 mugs up off the counter, full of cocoa and set one in front of Mikeyy. She got the phone and sat next to him. She dialled the number and took a sip of cocoa. After a couple of rings Justin answered.

'Hello?'

'Heyy Sunshine its Deb.'

'Debbie!' Justin almost shouted, a smile forming on his face.

'So how have you been...'

A long conversation followed between Debbie, Justin and Mikeyy who eventually got a word in. Mostly about life and silly little things, Rage, Art, New York, Pittsburgh etc...

'So how is new York?' Debbie asked.

'Truthfully I hate it... I can't paint, well anything good! I barely make enough money, my art agent fell through and i'm constantly miserable!'

'Awww sunshine it can't be that bad'

'It is!' Justin assured her.

'Well why don't you come back?' She asked hopeful, not that she didn't want Justin to be successful, but she missed him.

'I don't know Deb, I barely have enough money, and I would have nowhere to live and Brian...' Justin's voice cracked.

'Are you alright?

'Erm, yeah fine...' Pain evident in Justin's voice.

'You miss him don't you? Debbie said softly.

'So much Deb. I literally have no reason why I left. I screwed everything up...'

'Sunshine don't talk like that!'

'Does he miss me?'

Debbie sighed. 'Yes, he hasn't told me but it's so obvious. Little things remind him of you, like when he saw hunter working at the diner you could tell he was thinking about you. He hasn't been himself ever since you left. You need to come home, sunshine.'

A sympathetic smile lit his face.

'I don't know Deb, it's all my fault, i'm sure he hates me for what I have done, he deserves better...'

'DON'T TALK LIKE THAT, he's loved you ever since the beginning...'

Mikeyy who had fell silent agreed with Justin, he hated Justin for leaving, as his best friend was now a shadow of his former self and it was all Sunshine's fault... but he didn't know what would change if the blonde returned back to Pittsburgh...

He heard Debbie shout forcefully down the phone,

'Right sunshine listen to me. You are coming home. You can stay at mine until you find your feet, your job at the diner is still there and you have money from rage so you will find a place of your own soon enough. You can keep painting and someone decent will find your art in Pittsburgh and finally you can sort out Brian! Right Mikeyy?'

'Mmm' Mikeyy replied not knowing how this would affect Brian?

Justin sighed. 'Okay.' There was no point arguing with Deb. He thought.

'I will be on the earliest flight back, see you soon'

'Right, bye Sunshine.' Justin hung up the phone and Deb did the same.

'Sunshine is coming back to stay!' Debbie shouted jumping up to her feet and engulfing Mikeyy in a hug.

'That's great!' Mikeyy said rolling his eyes.

**Please review, continue or not?  
And vote on whether it should be and Mpreg story or not! **

**Thanks for reading!**


	4. Chapter 4

Sorry for the wait guys, my computer has been broken so I had to get a new one Anyway here you go.

CHAPTER 4:

Justin was all packed he looked around the apartment just to check if there wasn't anything important that he had left, _nope all packed_, he thought to himself. He halled all of his luggage to the front door and looked at his watch 1pm, 2 hours till his flight and 3 till he will see his friends, extended family and most importantly Brian. Justin walked over to the sofa and slumped down on it, he thought about everything, the very moment his eyes laid upon New York outside his window.

When he had first come to New York he thought everything was fine. He found a decent apartment with a great roommate, one of Daphne's friends, he had work, an agent and even though he missed Brian so much, he THOUGHT they would stay in touch and that this was for the best but he was wrong... When he got to New York his agent set him up to paint 2 dozen paintings for a very big chain of hotels that were re-decorating. It was worth a lot of money and Justin thought it would be great as a starter. He had 24 weeks to paint 24 semi-large paintings that all had to be new, some country landscape, some abstract, some just colour and some of New York's sky line. Everything just HAD to suit the hotels ambiance. So Justin set to work and he did nothing but work, he couldn't even sleep - at best he got 4 hours when he was drained but his mind wouldn't rest he had nightmares that stuck and would never let him sleep, mostly of losing Brian or his art but now and again his prom nightmares came back and that shuck Justin to the core. Every day was the same and after a couple paintings his hand started to cramp, he wasn't surprised but after that whenever his hand touched a paintbrush it hurt like hell and he couldn't even paint for more than an hour. He was exhausted... He finished his last painting a couple of weeks after the deadline and the hotel wasn't happy, after looking over the paintings they only excepted 1 dozen and Justin almost told them to stick their deal where the sun doesn't shine but he needed the money for rent and for living his life. So he ended up having only 8 weeks to paint 1 dozen paintings of their new request 'capital cities atmosphere'. Again he worked his ass of pushing his hand to the limit and at the end, he ended up having a cast on his wrist because his muscles couldn't stand being moved so had to be supported. He took the paintings to the hotel to see if they fit the bill and again they were wrong so Justin lost it and quit, too tired to care. The hotel paid for the 12 but not what they promised and so it was only enough for one month's rent and so he was late for the second month and had to get his roommate to pay for him and he promised to pay her back. After that his agent left him as he literally couldn't paint and he got angry. Justin got a job like he had at the diner and eventually made enough to pay his roommate back. So now all his money went to rent and food which he barely ate. He was very very skinny although he denied it and didn't notice as his mind was somewhere else. His roommate definitely noticed the difference he was just skin and bones and all he ate practically every day was just a boost bar or sometimes a salad if he was forced and he drank a lot of water. He had nothing, he was nothing. He couldn't do art and if he could he had no inspiration, He hated his job, and he only had one friend. He was in pain a lot and most of all he missed Brian so much it hurt. He had, had no contact with his love all the time he was in New York. Little things reminded him of Brian that it hurt like hell. He was emotionally and physically drained and his last option was to go home even if the man he loved didn't want him in his life anymore...

After a while he drifted off into a light sleep only to be woken by his roommate Lucy.

'Heyy' she whispered.

'Hi' his voice hoarse from pure exhaustion.

She grimaced at how fragile he looked his voice matching his look.

'You're gonna miss your flight silly, come on I will drive you'

Justin didn't have the energy to protest; he sat up and winced at the shooting pain in his hand still inside the cast. He trundled over to grab his duffel bag, slung it over his shoulder and grabbed his painkillers, some water and his sketch book and followed Lucy to her small red ford just outside the block of flats. The journey was quiet and when they finally arrived at the airport Lucy broke the silence.

'I'm gonna miss you babe' she said quietly.

'Me too Luce'

'Call me when you land so I know you're ok and we have to keep in touch, yes?'

'Of course, oh here is the rest of the money I owe you for last month's rent'

'Oh no you need it more than I do, I mean come on I have a good job and a rich boyfriend... she chuckled... you keep it'

'No, I need to give it to you I hate owing people money, take it.' And he forced the brown envelope full of cash into her hand. She reluctantly took it and smiled sadly as what she now called her best friend. She pulled Justin's tiny frame into her arms and gave him a long hug Justin burying his face in her long brown hair much like he does when he hugs Brian. When the hug ended they whispered goodbye to each other and Justin grabbed all of his belongings and slowly walked to the airport, with Lucy never taking her eyes of the vulnerable man walking into the airport with almost nothing...

Please review! Makes me Update faster ;)

Ps: Mpreg yay or nay VOTE!


	5. Chapter 5

Sorry for the wait guys...

CHAPTER 5:

Brian awoke at Kinnetik after dinner. He had slept for a couple hours constantly dreaming about his Sunshine. He missed him so much, he constantly wondered why he let him go, why they hadn't talked for months, why Lindsey showed him that magazine and why he hadn't seen, touched or told him he loved him for so long. He didn't know whose fault it was that they hadn't talked for so long he knew he was avoiding Justin because he couldn't face the hurt of him not being by his side but he knew Justin hadn't even tried to contact him and for the life of him he didn't know why. All these questions swirled around in his head with no answers; it gave him a splitting headache. He walked over to his desk and called through the intercom for Ted, he came shuffling into his office not 10 seconds later.

'What's up Bri?'

'What's up is that I have a splitting headache and i'm going home; think you can hold the fort for today?'

'Um sure Bri anything you want. I'll call if there are any major emergencies. See you tomorrow.' With that he nodded his head to Brian and turned on his heel to walk out.

Brian grabbed his briefcase and some documents and walked out to his corvette he slumped down in the driver's seat and paused. He looked at himself in the mirror he looked tired, with bags under his eyes. He cursed and looked out the window. Sun shone through the city. 'God sunshine look what you've done to me, I need you...'

Ring, ring, ring...

The splitting sound cut through his thoughts and brought him back to the real world. He grabbed his cell flipped it open and shouted down the line without looking at the caller ID.

'What?'

'Heyy Brian' he said ignoring the tone of voice.

'Mikeyy, to what do I owe this pleasure'

'Well I haven't seen you for a bit I was wondering if you wanted to meet up at the diner later for a bite?

He was right he hadn't seen his best friend for a while to be honest he hadn't seen much of his extended family since someone left for New York. He had distanced himself from everyone including all tricks, all he did was work and basically drink himself into oblivion and get high each night to drown the pain. Mikeyy sometimes came to see him and they ate fatty foods and talked the night away but most times he was alone and it was killing him. He was so used to Justin being with him that his life just collapsed when he left. He didn't know what to do anymore...

He sighed 'Okay Mikeyy what time?'

'Seven, don't be late' He teasingly said, the smile was evident in his voice.

'Okay Mikeyy see you later'

'Later, erm Brian?'

'Hmmm?'

'I love you'

'Me too' And with that he disconnected the phone and Mikeyy followed suit.

Brian started the corvette and lazily drove to the loft. Hoping his meet with Mikeyy would put his mind off someone for just a couple hours...

Justin was aboard the plane sat next to a stuck up mother and her annoying daughter. He was in the seat nearest the aisle and stared it at no one in particular. He had boarded the plane without a hastle and now he was heading towards his home. His thoughts clouded his mind and when the snack cart came by he barely noticed, the lady shook him to bring him back to the real world. She smiled kindly at him when he looked at her with sorry eyes. She noticed how skinny and tired he looked and offered him some food.

'Hello, can I get you anything sir?'

'Ermmm...' his voice was hoarse and she looked at him with worried eyes.

He cleared his throat. 'Can I have some water please and what candy do you have?' He asked politely. She handed him some water and listed the Candy.

'Can I have a boost bar?' He played it safe he wanted to keep something down.

She handed him the boost bar. '2$ please sir.'

He handed her his money and she carried on down the aisle. He drank half his water in one gulp; he then opened his boost and started to eat. Half way through he felt horrible. He quickly jumped out of his chair and ran towards the toilet. The air stewardess who had just served him noticed him running towards the toilet, she handed the cart over to her colleague and rushed to see if he was alright. When she approached the toilet she heard the sound of someone heaving, she knocked on the door and slid it open as it wasn't locked. She then saw Justin with his arm over the toilet seat and his head resting there. She could now see all of his bones in his back as the t-shirt were stretched over his body. She almost was sick herself she could almost count all of his ribs it made her sick. She felt so sorry for him. She knelt down beside him and hesitantly put her hand on his back, feeling nothing but skin and bone. He flinched on her touch and looked toward the person beside him. She smiled at him.

'I'm Hannah are you all right?'

He tried to smile but couldn't muster up enough strength. He flushed the toilet, slammed down the lid and shifted to lean his back against the wall. He groaned and she became very concerned, she shifted herself so she was sat next to him. She looked at the frail body beside her so limp and lifeless. There was not one bone on his body she couldn't see yet when she first saw him she had no idea he was THIS skinny. He must be good at hiding it she thought as she didn't miss much. She placed her hand on his knee and they sat in comfortable silence for a couple of moments then she broke the silence.

'You know I never did get your name?'

'Justin' He croaked. His voice broke her heart but she decided to avoid the subject for now.

'Where you heading?'

'Home, Pittsburgh.'

'Cool got any friends or family there?'

'Yeah'

'A better half?' She joked.

Justin smiled faintly at the mention of his better half, Brian definitely was his better half wether he liked to be called it or not. But he didn't know if they still saw each other as that so he just kept his mouth shut but Hannah saw that smile and immediately caught on.

'Okay, who is she?'

'It's a he' he said bluntly hoping it wouldn't scare her off'

'Oh, that's cool. Is he special?' Justin was thankful she was accepting and smiled.

'Very'

'You must be very excited to see him, does he know you're coming?'

'I am and no he doesn't. It's a surprise.'

'Well I hope you have a nice life in Pittsburgh with your better half, god wish I had one.' She joked. She slowly rose to her feet and offered her hands out to help Justin up. He accepted the help and rose to his feet, he struggled to gain his balance at first and Hannah stood by and helped him not to fall. After a minute he was ok and thanked her for the help.

'Are you sure you're ok. I mean you could hardly keep a Boost bar down, you're dizzy and i'm sorry to say it but you are very skinny.' She knew it wasn't her place to say it but she couldn't help it, it was in her nature.

Justin sighed nearly everyone he met told him the same thing and he still didn't believe it. He would only believe it if Brian told him as he never lied to him but he decided to give her the answer she wanted.

'It is fine, I'M fine i'm going to be with Brian and everything is going to be ok.' He said in a soothing voice. She sighed in relief.

'Oh is that his name, well he is very lucky to have such a nice man like you'

'Ha, thanks' he said softly then smiled.

'Ok now you get back to your seat and try to relax for the rest of the flight and if you need anything just ask me. Oh and I might see you i'm going to be staying in Pittsburgh for a couple months after I have finished all my flights.'

Justin smiled, she liked Hannah but he was very tired and just wanted to get home and see his friends, family and most importantly Brian.

'Okay' he said.

They exchanged numbers and Justin sat back down and tried to relax he was anxious to get home... After a couple of hours Justin stepped outside of the airport and he was now in Pittsburgh he smiled 'home' he thought. He hailed a cab and put his mere belongings into the boot and slumped in the backseat.

'Liberty Avenue please.' He said to the cab driver.

'Where at on Liberty?' He said bluntly.

Justin hadn't thought of that he didn't know whether to see Brian straight away or to see someone else. He knew Debbie wouldn't be working now as it was too early and he decided he wanted to be on his own first and have a coffee which he hoped he could keep down. He gave the cab driver the address of the diner and they set off. Justin looked through the window and once again his mind clouded with thoughts of Brian...

REVIEW please!


	6. Chapter 6

Another Chapter for you guys!

CHAPTER 6:

Justin arrived at the street where the diner was. The cab driver decided he would park away from the entrance and so Justin had to work through an alley to get there as we was walking through he heard a voice behind him and he flinched with fear...

'Heyy pretty boy where you headed?' The strange voice behind him angrily said.

Justin didn't know what to do, he didn't know whether to run or to talk back to them. He knew situations like this could get ugly and very quickly. He decided to just walk away and set off down the alley to the light at the end. The gruff voice behind him spoke again,

'I said where are you going?' in a more angry voice.

He put his hand on Justin's shoulder hoping to turn him around to face him and his mate. Justin immediately pushed his hand off, his pink posse training returning to him, and walked off. The two men laughed and swiftly pulled his duffel bag to the floor and with one swift motion kneed him in the stomach. Justin instantly fell to the ground gasping for breath he felt his ribs shatter because he was so skinny. When he hit the ground the two men instantly jumped on him, kicking his chest, arms, legs and neck constantly, to what Justin thought was hours. He curled himself up in a ball and wished for a miracle. He wished Brian could be there right now and save him, he wished the cab driver had parked at the entrance. He cried into his hands the emotional and physical pain was un-bearable. He could hear the laughs and insults the two men were throwing at him but was too focused on the pain to care. He was so skinny so weak that he couldn't fight back and offer himself any protection. He just had to wait it out until the two men gave up and left him there to die. He could feel his bones cracking from the heavy boots that constantly rained down on him, images of his friends, family and Brian rushed through his mind as well as brief memories of the bashing. He protected his head with his frail hands as he didn't want them to hit is face and especially the place where he had been bashed before. The attack was unbearable and for the life of him he didn't know what to do now or after. Suddenly the guys stopped and sped down the alley shouting at each other to get the hell out of there. Justin was thankful but didn't know why they stopped. When Justin adjusted to the real world he heard the faint siren calls and instantly knew that they panicked and rushed to get away from the scene. Justin was aching all over his body. He halled himself to a seated position and then dragged himself to lean against the wall. He was hurt, badly and not just physically - he needed Brian but couldn't call anyone as his cell phone got smashed in the attack. This wasn't what he needed he just needed peace in his life and most importantly Brian. He didn't know what to do he had no energy to call a cab or walk and get help. He looked down at his beaten body and his blood stained, dirty shirt. He touched his face and felt blood oozing from his lip he quickly wiped away the evidence and hauled himself over to duffel bag. He unzipped it and rummaged around; he found his blue zip up jacket and started to put it on. As he slid his arm in he winced at the pain in his chest and a new batch of tears streamed down his face. He grabbed his chest and sat in the same position for a while hoping to ease the pain. When he felt a little bit better he pulled himself back to the wall and readied himself to stand up. He took a deep and heaved himself of the floor. He cried out in pain and leaned over - his hand and head pressed against the wall. He kept crying, the pain was unbearable. He took some more deep breaths and pushed on, he needed to get out of this alley and he knew it. He pushed himself off the wall gently and tried to straighten himself up. Again he winced at the excruciating pain but he was up, he steadied himself from the onslaught of nausea and breathed to stop himself from throwing up. After a couple of heartbeats he felt composed and readied himself to walk to the diner as it was the nearest place and he needed to check himself out and he couldn't do it in the dark alley he was in right now.

The bell jingled above his head. Signalling his arrival. He scanned the diner noticing it was fairly quiet and Debbie wasn't working – to his relief. Holding his ribs he slowly ambled toward the stools located next to the bar. He dropped his duffel bag next to a stool and slowly plopped down onto the red, leather surface. He rested his head in his hands still feeling the dull pain all over his body. He sighed - thinking about what he should do, until he heard a soft inquiry behind him.

'Justin?' Mikeyy asked in a confused voice.

Justin slowly lifted his head and turned to stare at the dark haired man to his right. He softly smiled and whispered.

'Mikeyy, long time no see'

'What you doing back?' He replied a little too curtly for Justin.

'Well I missed the diner food so much, I just had to return.' He replied sarcastically while moving to place his head back into his hands.

Mikeyy scanned Justin. He looked tired and weak but it didn't phase Mikeyy he wanted to know what was going on with Justin.

'I hope you are not trying to return and act like nothing happened?' Mikeyy asked deciding to get it off his chest.

'Well if i'm honest with you Mikeyy, I am yes.' Justin croaked back. He didn't need Mikeyy grilling him right now, especially after what just happened.

Mikeyy sighed and glared at Justin. Before thinking it through, it all came spilling out of his lips.

'Well, Boy Wonder that's not going to happen. You can't just leave for two months and come back thinking everything is going to be the same. Ha, you don't really think that Brian is going to take you back either do you?' He bit back - getting seriously annoyed at Justin for leaving and looking like he was ignoring him.

Justin sighed, he knew where Mikeyy was coming from, but he knew Brian and he knew what he wanted. He bit back the sarcastic reply that rose to his lips, as he didn't want to fight with Mikeyy and he really needed to lie down.

'Mikeyy I have only just landed in Pittsburgh and I'm not sure what I'm going to do right now, so please can you just leave me in peace'

Mikeyy huffed, Justin was seriously pressing his buttons, he hated Justin for what he was doing to Brian. Mikeyy had watched Brian suffer through the past 2 months without Justin, he never had really trusted Justin and now after he had left for New York he seriously doubted how good Justin was for Brian. He didn't want him getting back with Brian only to hurt him again.

'Well you can be sure of one thing, that you are not getting back together with Brian to hurt him again. That is not what he wants.' Mikeyy barked.

'Shut up Mikeyy you do NOT know what he wants, and you never have' Justin replied curtly. He stood up to glare into the eyes angrily staring back at him. He winced at the shear pain in his chest as he did so. Mikeyy not noticing Justin's pain and neither man noticing the long, lean brunet that just strode through the door. After a couple of seconds Justin turned away from Mikeyy's gaze and picked up his duffel and began to walk towards the door. Mikeyy deciding he needed the last word, grabbed Justin's shoulder a little too forcefully and what happened next was finished in a blink of an eye. Justin, being so weak and after the attack easily fell to the ground. He lost his footing as soon as Mikeyy spun him round, the wave of nausea consuming him as he fell to the ground. The unfortunate fall made worse by Justin's head making contact with the bright coloured counter of the diners bar. The splintering sound echoed through the diner as Justin finally landed on the floor in an unconscious heap. He looked so frail and weak. The pale skin contrasting with the thick red blood oozing out of his head, the duffel strewn next to him and his dirty, blood stained shirt slightly lifted to reveal the bruised and beaten chest. Michael stood still as a statue staring down at the frail body lying on the diner floor. He looked up to notice his best friend running over to Justin's body. The cries of Justin's name escaping form the brunet's lips. Brian looked up into Michael's eyes, the hurt and pain evident in his own, unshed tears threatening to fall. He looked back down at the beautiful blonde's body, thinking why Justin, why? 'Justin please wake up. I love you. I should have never let you go – please, Justin please...' He loved this man so much and he couldn't believe that he was back and he also couldn't believe that he was like this because of Mikeyy – his supposed best friend. He couldn't think of what Mikeyy had done, he just had to concentrate on his beautiful blonde lying unconscious on the floor. He yanked his cell phone out of his pocket and dialled 911.

Ten minutes later he was sat beside Justin in the ambulance clasping the slender pale hand in his, praying Justin would make it through - he couldn't live without him...

AUTHORS NOTE:

I'm sorry I hurt Justin again and yes I do think it's sad but I really love the emotions that 'hurt Justin' brings out of Brian.

After the bashing, I really liked how the writers wrote Brian's emotions and the interaction between Justin and Brian and I really wanted to have a go at writing it.

I'm sorry if no one likes it but I just wanted to write the story how I would like to write it.

PS: I know there isn't an alley near the diner but I just put one in for the story...sorrryyy ;)

REVIEW PLEASE!


	7. Chapter 7

Another chapter. Enjoy!

CHAPTER 7:

Brian couldn't take his eyes of the lifeless blonde laid on the stretcher inside the ambulance. The sirens and the bustling of the paramedic the only sounds Brian could hear. The journey gave Brian time to think, not that Brian wanted nor needed it. He knew that if he hadn't have pushed Justin away, he wouldn't have missed him terribly when he was in New York and he wouldn't be going through this pain and anguish of seeing his blonde hurt. Brian knew he loved him, so why hadn't he said it? He was scared and too stubborn, that's why. He never thought he would feel this away about anyone EVER. So he got scared and then pushed Justin away thinking it was the best for everyone. Know he knew he was wrong, his no regrets policy has gone out the window because his biggest regret was letting Justin go. His no apologies policy is buried now because he would always be sorry for what Justin now has to go through. His no excuses policy was no longer needed, as Brian didn't need excuses to be there for Justin and tell him how he feels. He knows Justin doesn't want him to change and doesn't expect him too, but Brian wants too. He knows he can tell Justin how he feels every day and whenever he wants. He still thinks it's hard but for Justin it's worth it. He can give Justin monogamy because he wants it and because no one ever has satisfied him like Justin has and because he wants to be with Justin with no barriers at all. He wants to live with Justin in Britin and have a family and not be step ford fags but make their own rules. He wants to marry Justin. He knew Justin would be surprised at all this but he knew that this was Brain Kinney and he wasn't changing because this has always been him, he just locked these notions away a long time ago because he was scared he would never find anyone but Justin unlocked all these thoughts and now he wasn't letting Justin go as this is what he wants. But for now Brian knows that all he needs to do is be there for Justin and tell him how much he loves him when he wakes and survives this. Brian hadn't noticed the ambulance stop and was surprised when the doors flung open. He never let go of Justin's hand when he was carried out of the back of the ambulance and into the hospital. Once inside he gave Justin a long lingering chaste kiss on the lips and watched Justin being rushed into surgery. A silent tear ran down his cheek as he was reminded of the last time he was here. I love you, sunshine. I know you can pull through this, please... Brian then slumped into the cold plastic chair awaiting the news and expecting his and Justin's extended family to be rushing in through the door any minute...

Sure enough a mere 10 minutes later the rest of the family came rushing in and was met with Brian with blood on his suit and hands, tear tracks down his face and a cold, distant look in his eyes. Everyone already knew what happened so didn't need to bombard him with questions as he looked like he wouldn't have been able to handle it. Debbie rushed over to his side and pulled him to his feet to give him a bone crushing hug.

'He is going to pull through this kiddo, just like before.' Her voice cracked on the last word but Brian nodded to show her he agreed even if he didn't believe her 100%. Jennifer then came over and gave him a hug to and whispered 'Oh Brian' over his shoulder. Brian pulled back from the hug and gave her a small smile which didn't reach his eyes. He slowly sat down on the chair and resumed staring at nothing imperticular with Debbie's hand slowly stroking his back.

Brian glanced at the clock, for hours he had been sat here, 4 hours. Is that good or bad, is Justin ok? God please say he is ok...

'God, they should be done by now, shouldn't they?' Brian asked to nobody imperticular.

'Brian, things like this take time, we just have to wait while the doctors do their best to save Justin' Debbie replied softly, while standing and pulling Brian back down into one of few white plastic chairs in the hallway.

'What if he isn't ok? What if... I can't lose him Deb, I just can't...' Brian finished in a pained voice, before a choked sob broke out. Debbie pulled Brian to her and Brian silently cried into her shoulder.

'You're not going to lose him, he is going to pull through, because he is strong. You know this! Plus he won't leave you without a fight – he isn't going to give up know.' Debbie softly chided Brian.

Brian let a small smile creep onto his lips; he took a deep breath and roughly swiped his tears away. He looked up to see Emmet and Ted give him a small smile and a nod, showing they agreed with Deb. Brian thanked anybody who was listening above, that Mikeyy wasn't here right now because he was sure he wouldn't be able to deal with him, maybe later but definitely not now.

After another 10 minutes Brian was sure his patience was about to run out but then the doors to surgery swished open and a tired looking doctor strolled out. Brian immediately jumped up and a second later the family were all surrounded around Brian.

'Is Justin okay?' Brian hurriedly asked.

'Justin is stable at the moment. We managed to stop the bleeding in his Brain, unfortunately the blow was very close to his prior injuries, so until he wakes up we will not know if there is any brain damage. The next 24 hours are critical and he isn't out of the woods yet. We are not entirely sure when or if he will awake from his coma after the operation. He appears very weak and is severely underweight so his body is working harder to keep him alive, this will have an effect on the time he is in a coma and his recovery time. He is on a breathing regulator and is currently situated in intensive care, room 14; you are allowed to visit him but 1 at a time. One person is allowed to stay in a cot in the room but the rest must leave and return tomorrow... when he is more stable and in less critical condition he will be moved to the main hospital rooms and more than one person can visit at a time.'

The family listened to the doctor very attentively and paled when the doctor said if he wakes for a coma, they couldn't speak as the doctor mentioned someone can see him now and as he excused himself to see another patient.

The family stood in shock and slowly returned to their original positions to process the news. They were all in shock. Justin might not wake up. They couldn't handle it no one could take their sunshine away.

Brian felt like someone was ripping his heart out. This couldn't be happening to his sunshine, not again, he didn't deserve this. Why did he come home? Maybe he does still love him? Why is it that, Justin is in the hospital because of his best friend? If Justin wakes up - NO correction, when he wakes up, then he is going to help and support him through it all, tell him he loves him and help him through all this bullshit so they can have a happy life together, just like they both want! He is also going to find out why Justin is so weak – and make sure he takes good care of him so he gets back to his chirpy happy self just like he loves. When he is back to himself, Brian is going to make all of Justin's dreams come true!

Review please!


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